Novel Bin Chapter 96: Her Concern (6)
Forcing a relationship will never work. When it will happen, it will happen; love is not that difficult... Why are you making yourself go through all this unnecessary agony?
The words that she heard on the subway cropped up in Song Qingchun’s mind again.
Yes, indeed, love could not be forced. If it could be forced, then the world would not have so much misery and heartache.
She knew Tang Nuan was no prized catch, but in Qin Yinan’s eyes, she was the best. If she was truly honest to herself, Qin Yinan was not the best man in the world either, but in Song Qingchun’s eyes, he was the best man there had ever been.
She had suffered through so much agony, silently and willingly, for Qin Yinan for so many years, and she had always believed she could persevere.
Song Cheng’s suicide, the Song family’s collapse, the pain of departure, and the many lows that had happened over the past three months, she had survived all that while gritting her teeth. Many times, tears had threatened to fall, but she’d pushed herself to pull through.
And she was tired of such a life. The condescension that she was sheltered from, and the miseries that she was spared her whole life, she had tasted them in a concentrated form over the past three months. She had lived for more than twenty years, and she had never been stingy with her love toward others. Yet, when she needed it the most, no one came to her aid. Therefore, when she saw how Qin Yinan shielded, cared for, and protected Tang Nuan that day, she suddenly realized how pitiful she was. At that moment, she really felt she had no energy left to love.
If two days ago, she’d had the idea of giving up, today she was really considering giving up.
The girl was right; she had suffered enough agony from her own family’s collapse, why should she subject herself to more agonies?
Song Qingchun took a deep breath, clicked ’select all’ for her stored email, and deleted them without hesitation.
At that moment, Song Qingchun could swear her heart stopped. Her finger paused for a long time on the mouse, and looking at the empty inbox, her heart felt equally empty.
She knew it was the right thing to do, but when she really did it, she realized how painful it was sometimes to do the right thing.
There was a sharp pain gathering in the depths of her eyes, and she felt her throat was closing up. She tried to hold them down for a long time, but in the end, she surrendered to the pain and cried her heart out as she collapsed before the computer.
She had been tailing him for at least twenty years. His position in her life was no lesser than the spiritual weight of a religion, and now she had forcefully weaned herself off from the sustenance of this religion.
What was she going to do in the future? Would she find another person who she would love like she loved Qin Yinan?
Song Qingchun cried for a long time before the tears stopped. She raised her head to glance at the clock. It was 7:10 pm. She smeared the tears on her face as she walked to the bathroom. After she had washed the signs of crying from her face, she took several deep breaths before walking toward the bedroom door.
Song Qingchun was shocked when she pulled open the door and involuntarily faltered a few steps back. To her surprise, Su Zhinian was leaning against the banister, staring with absolute focus at her door.
He’s home?
As the question flitted across Song Qingchun’s mind, her brows creased deeply because the next second she noticed Su Zhinian’s attire.
Why is he in a sweater when he is normally only in a suit?